Hello Kitty is a Secret Plot to Control Men

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My friend Eric, over at ‘Smoothness Promotes Aging‘ sent me this photo yesterday.

Hello Kitty Zombie

And at the very moment I looked at this t-shrit I felt happy and I wondered is this the happiness that Mylie T feels when she looks at all the thousands of thosands of Hello Kitty items in our house?

Then I realized, No, this can’t be the happiness she feels because it a plot.  It is a plot that includes all the women who like Hello Kitty.  They are  in competition with the each other to see how many items they can get before their husbands or boyfriends totally flip out.

But the plot gets sicker and has an evil twist that even Satan himself would be in awe.

It starts with the Hello Kitty toaster, then the Hello Kitty timer, then the Hello Kitty radio, then it keeps building and building.  In the end they keep pushing the limits and if they don’t reach their goal of breaking the will of their man fast enough – they have a second motive.  The Ultimate Goal!

The Ultimate Goal gives any woman the ULTIMATE BRAGGING RIGHTS to stake claim that they had their husbands mowing the lawn with this……

Hello Kitty Lawnmower

So when I see a dead or even a zombie Hello Kitty I feel happy because I see the evil that lurks in those dark eyes of Hello Kitty.

There is one thing that all the guys out there should remember and keep it close to your heart … that the only good Hello Kitty is a dead Hello Kitty.

dead-hello-kitty

Comments
  • Kill Kittie1

    September 9, 2010

    I thought this was a horror movie site WHY IS HELLO KITTY HERE?

    Reply
    • Jason Bayless2

      September 9, 2010

      Because Hello Kitty is just as, if not more scary than any horror movie

      Reply
  • Mark Stevenson3

    September 9, 2010

    Hello Kitty is overrated

    Reply
  • Sally4

    September 9, 2010

    I want that lawnmower for my husband. I would take a photo of him mowing the grass and blow the photo up into a poster and hang it in our bedroom.

    Reply
    • Jason Bayless5

      September 9, 2010

      Send the photo this way and we will put it on Zombie Popcorn!

      Reply
  • Tony6

    September 9, 2010

    My girlfriend, I love her to death, but she is totally killing me with Hello Kitty

    Reply
  • Vancouver Escorts8

    September 9, 2010

    Hey , I just stopped by to visit your website and thought I’d say thank you .

    Reply
  • Elizabeth9

    January 16, 2010

    Hello kitty needs to go and jump in a boiling pot of acid with her girlfriend

    Reply
  • Jabe11

    August 19, 2009

    Amberlyn, I’m with you. I cannot STAND Hello Kitty…
    There are officially two of us.

    Reply
  • Mariana12

    August 18, 2009

    haha will doo but he won’t ever use it 🙂

    Reply
  • Jason Bayless13

    August 15, 2009

    yes, in a indirect way, that is what I am saying 🙂

    If you get the lawn mower and you have your boyfriend cutting the grass with it – PLEASE! send me a photo

    Reply
  • Mariana14

    August 15, 2009

    Soo what your saying is im making my boyfriend crazy with all my hello kitty stuff?? I have the radio. haha nice blog its funnyy.

    oh and p.s.
    i want that lawn mower 😀

    Reply
  • Stephanie16

    January 30, 2009

    I don’t hate Hello Kitty but I am not crazy about her either. I used to like her a little .. I mean she is a cute character but I wouldn’t buy everything that has her picture on it. It’s so annoying and makes her look like a cute “prostitute”. She’s an item whore, lol

    Reply
  • Amberlyn17

    January 29, 2009

    so we could start a bonfire with all my sister’s Hello Kitty stuff. It would make me feel better. I bet you would too. I swear I’m the only woman on Earth that hates Hello Kitty. will you guys adopt me?

    Reply

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